


Tales of the Bathroom Break

by azumilk



Category: Naruto
Genre: Alcohol, Drunken Shenanigans, F/M, Suggestive Themes, Team Bonding, sasuke has no filter
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-10-27
Updated: 2018-10-27
Packaged: 2019-07-27 03:58:27
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 509
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/16210934
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/azumilk/pseuds/azumilk
Summary: Sasuke’s bathroom time exceeds an hour and, contrary to popular belief, it's not because he's vain.





	Tales of the Bathroom Break

**Author's Note:**

> Written in celebration of SasuSaku Month 2013. The prompt was "Sasuke’s bathroom time exceeds an hour."

“I think your husband is in love with his face,” Naruto proclaimed, words full of firm conviction.

 

“What the hell, Naruto!” Sakura playfully bopped his head.

 

“Ow-ow! Sakura-chan!” Naruto protested.

 

Several people in the pub looked at their direction but quickly dismissed them after realizing that they were just drunk shinobi taking a break from their mission.

 

“I saw Sasuke a few days ago,” Sai interrupted. “I was about to enter the restroom when I saw him looking at the mirror. He was observing every angle of his face.”

 

“Liar.”

 

“Oh but it’s true, ugly. He even smirked at his reflection. When he left I reenacted it to see what the fuss was about.”

 

“Sai, you weirdo, Sasuke-kun isn’t like that.”

 

Her tirade was interrupted by the fourth person in the table: “Yesterday I went to the headquarters. I saw Sasuke with a hot kunoichi and —”

 

“Don’t you start too, Kakashi-sensei!”

 

She was clearly annoyed, something that the men of Team Seven found amusing, inspiring them to further provoke her on purpose. Teasing their one and only female teammate was fun especially when she was drunk. And when their topic was Uchiha Sasuke. She may be violent, and they may have some bruises after, but she was too entertaining to watch when she’s mad.

 

“I bet Sasuke stays in the bathroom for hours,” Kakashi nonchalantly continued. He turned a page of his orange book.

 

She hiccuped and guzzled her beer. Her face was already red from drinking too much.

 

“He stays in the bathroom for at least two hours,” she confirmed, holding two fingers up for emphasis.

  

“That's so weird! I don’t even last for ten minutes inside the bath—”

 

“We get it, Naruto. Your dick is small.”

 

“Why you… — Ow Sakura! Oww!”

 

“You dare make fun of Sasuke-kun!” She warned, giving them death glares. She was intoxicated, yet she cracked her knuckles, fully prepared to punch the three of them to oblivion.

 

“Sakura, calm down,” Kakashi said, finally pulling his eyes off his porn.

 

She was about to threaten them with bodily harm when a hand tapped her shoulder. Her head whipped up to see the subject of their conversation standing behind her.

 

Uchiha Sasuke regarded them quietly, primly settling on the empty seat to her right. Everyone was silent except for Naruto who automatically complained about Sasuke’s cocky entrance.

 

“You were saying?” He crossed his legs and looked at Sakura expectantly.

 

She tucked her hair behind her ears and faked a laugh. “Oh nothing, nothing Sasuke-kun!”

 

“Ugly was talking about the mystery behind your long trips in the bathroom.”

 

Sakura secretly kicked Sai’s legs. She had to admit his ability to maintain a pokerface despite these kinds of situations was admirable.

 

She smiled at Sasuke, expecting him to shrug and tell Naruto to shut up. Instead, he leveled his gaze at her.

 

“Then why don’t you give them a specific answer, wife?” He smirked, “What _we’re_ doing in the bath—”

 

Mortified, Sakura grabbed her beer and stuffed it in his mouth before he could utter another word.


End file.
